Dear Diary - Dawn

In December of 1981 young Jeffrey joined a "show band" called Sensitivity.

For those of you who have never seen such an act, this means that in addition to playing the current dance music of the day, we also performed a one-hour "Vegas style" variety show as our 2nd set.

In the early 80s, this type of thing was very popular at large hotel nightclubs.

As you can see, Sensitivity had 3 attractive female singer/dancers backed by a 4-piece band. Until this point, I had only ever played with unshaven rock musicians in stinky bars, so this was a brand new experience for me.

This next segment of my diary takes place at a swanky corporate hotel in downtown Providence, Rhode Island in January of '82.

Then I met a girl. Just like that too. We were playing one nite in the 1st week and I was watching the girls, as usual, dancing in front of me but I didn't really notice any exceptionally cute ones to talk to (or try to anyway). But one girl I didn't notice had met Hank at the end of the night so he told her he was married and pointed to me. She was drunk and seemed to take instant interest in me as she led me to her table. "What's your name?" I queried. "Dawn" was her reply. It was very clever dialog on my part. "Would you like a drink?" "Yes, please." I had her now. Soon I realized that we must talk and I told her to wait at the bar while I quickly ran to change my clothes. She seemed almost surprised to see me come back and explained that she really didn't think I would. Dawn was a very pretty woman about 23 or so. She seemed lonely and sad and was quick to come right out and tell me she appreciated my concern and company. Well, one thing tumbled ahead to another and soon (with not much hesitation on my part), we were together. We spent a good deal of the next 3 weeks together which caused some very interesting problems.

And now... the rest of the story:

"Interesting problems" was a bit of an understatement.

You see, as a naive 20 year-old musician who was on the road for the first time, I had no experience with high-end east coast hotel night clubs or the clientele who frequented them. Like Dawn for instance.

It was interesting because during the 3 weeks we were together, we did really normal things during the day - like going to the mall, taking her 6 year old son to the zoo and seeing the sites in Boston. And then at night she'd show up late and we'd sit up and watch TV and talk and do other things that couples normally do.

So imagine my surprise when one night, the police knocked on my door with a search warrant and drug sniffing dogs, and made us step out of the room so they could search it. Also imagine my surprise when Hank, the owner of the band, pulled me aside to tell me that Dawn was not the "nice" girl I seemed to think she was - and that she had apparently been arrested at another hotel before for trading "favors" for cocaine.

Oops!

Needless to say I was heartbroken. And confused. And in denial.

So what do you do when you're a songwriter whose heart has just been broken?

You wax poetic with a pun-laden tribute to the girl you cannot have.

Dawn When I think of Dawn, it's not the day or a sudden thought that passed my way The word means more to me than this it means a soft and gentle kiss And when I see Dawn I do see light But not the kind that ends the night No, I see love shine from inside so bright, the sun in shame would hide And when the sunrise warms the day Dawn warms my heart in the same way And helps the seeds of love we share To grow, and be forever there The beauty of the break of day is what Dawn is, the poets say They see its beauty when it's light I see its beauty day or night And Dawn means starting new again like every morning that has been And Dawn is music the same way Like when the birds sing for the day And Dawn gives life to everyone the way the flowers need the sun And like a child that we know Dawn gives life to help him grow My love is like the drops of dew because it's there when Dawn is too It's only different in one way it won't dry up and go away So Dawn means many things to me all of which in her I see And in the cold, dark night I find that Dawn is always on my mind

*Sob*

So there you have it, another entry from the diary that keeps on giving.

Until now. You see I've finally read through the whole thing, and except for hours of music-related entries, I don't know that there's much more in the way of embarrassing romantic failures. Therefore, I think I'll hang it up with this one.

So say adieu to young Jeffrey... a young man who couldn't seem to get anything right and just wanted to be loved.

Is that so wrong?

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If you'd like to read the previous 5 entries in this Dear Diary series, just click on the "DIARY" label here.